Our sex lives are complex, and there are a lot of things, which could help us, spruce them up, especially in the 21st century. There are many toys, various lubricants and special additives, which are supposed to make us last longer in bed or have a lot more fun. However, something as simple as the female orgasm is quite often neglected, and people go on for hours without realizing how to achieve it. After all it turns out that it is not so simple, and there is an abundance of factors, which will govern it, and even more methods you can employ to achieve it.
Header image from theladiescoach.com.
Race Against the Clock
The first thing, which is absolutely essential to understand about making a woman orgasm, is the fact that you should not worry about time. Countless men are so captivated in the notion that they have to last for hours, and they have to do so in order to make their partner orgasm. In truth, you should be a lot less concentrated on the orgasm, and more concentrated on the fun you are both having. Research has stated that pleasure during sex is closely related to relaxation.
There is yet another thing, which you might as well realize about both the male and the female orgasm. They are governed by arousal, and arousal on its own is not dictated solely from how much foreplay you are going through, or what techniques you are using. There is a reason why people go on dates and aim to impress their peers as much as possible. The romantic notion that this will help you find your soul mate aside, each impression you make, be it with a talent or something else, turns to sexual friction. The woman you are aiming at impressing becomes more interested in you, and even if it sounds as a long shot, this is proven to increase the pleasure she will have with you during sex.
There is a recent study, which shows that women, who believe that their looks are not sufficient to please their partner, tend not to orgasm easily, especially during oral sex. This is yet another psychological trick, which you should understand and assess. If you really like what you are seeing – speak up. Flattery will improve the confidence of your partner, and therefore their ability to relax and enjoy the intercourse.
You should always know how to gently stimulate your partner during foreplay sessions. You may as well make her orgasm before you have even started with the main course. For each woman, it will be different, but basically you will need to gently start building up pleasure. First make sure you caress around the clitoris, not head on. Most women are proven to be sensitive for the heads on approach, and you need to take this into consideration. Remember to start slow and go on more quickly as you progress and see that you are succeeding.
A lot of men seem to either not understand, or forget this, but the level of penetration is extremely important during sex. Different women will enjoy different angles more. Most will adore it if you stimulate their g-spot, especially during intercourse, instead of with your fingers. However, some might not enjoy this as much as a certain angle of penetration, which builds tension. What you two need to do is actually experiment quite a while – there is no success on the first try because each and every woman is completely different in that department. With that in mind, make sure you try a lot of things.
Multitasking is Cool
Do you like multitasking at work, always doing a couple of different things, along with your main job? The same goes for sex, and you should know that added stimulation always works wonders. Instead of concentrating solely on the sheer penetration, you should try out positions, which allow you to stimulate other parts of her body as well. You have hands, teeth, a tongue and a lot of other parts, which can be used, instead of just lying around while she does all the work. Make sure you offer stimulation during intercourse – this is an essential thing, especially if you care for your partner’s pleasure.
You should understand that there are certain ways to sense her orgasm, and not just to know when it is coming, but to understand what builds up to it. Instead of shooting your tongue chaotically around her clitoris, you should start off slow, kiss around and see what she likes. Even though there are some predominant rules, every woman is totally different in what she prefers. After you have experimented enough, you should know when she is about to climax – you can watch for a subtle color change, or simply press your hand gently against her stomach to feel the contractions, which start right before climax.
Never Stop at the End
There is only one thing, which you should never, ever do when the female orgasm is concerned. Women love it when you try out different techniques, and experiment all the time. However, when she is about to climax, you should not stop or change the technique whatever happens – this will most commonly instantly stop here from feeling anything and even cause a numbing sensation, instead of pleasure later on. This is why when you know that you are close to achieving it, you should not stop with what you are doing.
Nice Guys Finish Last
You should know that you should try to make her finish first. There is a romantic notion, which states that the mutual orgasm is the greatest thing on the planet, and most likely it is so. However, you need to realize that it is hard to achieve it. This is why, instead of trying out experiments, make sure you satisfy and even make her climax before the actual intercourse. This will make certain she is satisfied, and you might even make her a little present afterwards, when she goes for a second round during the intercourse part.